The beautiful life of Saint Monica, wife and mother of St. Augustine:
Childhood: Saint Monica was born in Thagaste (present-day Souk Ahras, Algeria), Africa, in the year 331. As she is a very old Saint, little is known about her, usually what her son Saint Augustine wrote and told. But what is known is of great value and a huge example for everyone. Her parents were observant and fervent Catholics and instructed all their children in the faith well. Monica was also instructed by one of her housekeepers. She also corrected Monica and her sisters since childhood for any fault or failure they committed. Monica was always devoted to going to Holy Mass and she always prayed morning and night and helped the poor. She also enjoyed reading and praying the Psalms.
Temptation of wine: At home, Monica was given the task of serving wine to adults during meals. As she was still a child, she and the other girls were prohibited from drinking. But Monica fell into temptation and started drinking a little wine every day. And sipping more and more each day, she even had a drink. One of the maids knew that. One day, she fell out with Monica, and to humiliate her, she told everyone that she drank secretly and called her a great wine drinker. Monica was very embarrassed and decided never to fall into these temptations again.
Teenager and bride: Monica grew up a great young woman, always obedient to her parents, kind and helpful to everyone in the house. At that time, young women were married very early and their parents were already thinking of finding her a husband. It was always the fathers who chose the husbands for their daughters and they married around 12 to 18 years old and always with older men. Usually the husbands were close to 30 years old or more. Machismo was also great throughout the world and in that year of 340. Husbands ruled their wives a lot. Saint Paul said, "The husband that has no faith is sanctified by his wife." (1 Corinthians 7, 14) Monica's parents chose young Patricius as her husband. He was in his thirties, worked as a city decurion and owned some properties. Patricio was a pagan, that is, he had no religion. We don’t known why Monica's parents chose a pagan husband for her, who was so religious. The most likely is perhaps because he owned property and would guarantee him a more stable economic situation.
Marriage and mother-in-low: Monica accepted marriage as a mission given by God to her. She was a wife full of kindness and sweetness. The mother-in-law of Monica lived in the same house and was a very difficult person. In the first days, the mother-in-law didn't like Monica and was always irritated with her. But the worse her mother-in-law was, the more Monica loved her and pleased her as if nothing had happened. Some maids in the house also teased Monica and tried to make an ugly image of her to her husband Patricio. But Monica continually forgave and then the maids and her mother-in-law saw how kind she was and then changed completely with her. They then started to like Monica a lot and praised her a lot for her husband.
Patience with her husband: Patricius was of a proud, arrogant and impetuous character. But he had a good heart. He was kind to his wife, but in many problems, he lost his temper and got very nervous and angry. But in difficult times, Monica didn't argue with her husband and didn't lose her temper, even listening to insults. She spoke with delicacy and flexibility. It was common for husbands to beat their wives. But as Monica was very calm and patient, she never got beaten up by her husband, who was also violent. As time passed, Patricio improved his temper with Monica's example, learning with her how to solve problems calmly and wisely. This did not happen overnight, but over the years, requiring a great deal of patience from Monica. She always prayed for Patricius's conversion, so that one day, he would be interested in being a practicing Catholic too. Patricio always respected faith of Monica and he had no problem with that.
Monica with the neighbors: Whenever the neighbors and wifes gathered to talk, they spoke ill of their husbands, as many of them were really authoritarian and mistreat them. But Monica never spoke ill of her husband to anyone, because speaking ill of others is a sin. He treated her badly, but she didn't spread it and she did not think about getting a divorce. Neighbors vented to her about their husbands' impatience and Monica advised them to settle everything calmly, not to argue at the wrong times, to talk at the right times, as she did at home. A saying goes: "The thicker a person is, the more gentle you must be with them." Some neighbors followed her advice and then came back to thank her saying that it had helped them a lot. Certainly, Monica suffered a lot with the abuse of her husband, but she sought strength with the help of God, prayer and the Word of God, because everything is possible for those who believe.
Birth of children: Monica and Patricius had 3 children: the eldest Augustine, Perpetua and Navidio. We know little about them. What we do know is that Patricio tried to make them be non-religious like him, but Monica wouldn't allow it. She always educated them in the faith and practice of the Word of God. Perpetua and Navidio had Monica's temperament and were of great faith and prayer like her. Navidio was a good man. He married and had two daughters who became religious. Perpetua got married and after becoming a widow, she became a religious. After Augustine's conversion, she was chosen superior in the convent that he founded in Hippo. But Augustine, the most famous song of Monica, followed his father's rebelliousness and temper. As a child, Augustine had neither faith nor interest in the things of God. At that time, Baptism was given to children aged 12 and older, as was First Communion. Monica let Navidio and Perpetua receive Baptism and the Eucharist, but since Augustine neither believed nor respected, she did not allow him to receive them at that age, only when he had devotion. And she started to pray always for the conversion of this son, which was what would give her the most work. She always tried to convince him to be interested in the things of God. For Monica, all that was left was patience, hope and prayer. And these were her weapons before the Lord in her daily prayers.
Husband's conversion: After praying for her husband's conversion for many years, Monica saw that Patricius finally became interested in becoming a Catholic after 19 years of marriage. She said he should be baptized. He accepted and received Baptism with devotion and conversion. By attending Holy Mass and listening to the Word of God, Patricius became another man. Monica was immensely happy, after waiting so many years. But that didn't last long, as Patricius fell ill and died months later. Monica suffered from it, but accepted it with resignation and as God's will. She prayed a lot for her husband's soul. At the time, Augustine was 17 years old and Monica was 40 years old.
Widow with holiness: Monica did not want to remarry. She went on to live as a widow dedicated to her children and to the Lord. She wore only simple dresses, fasted and helped the poor. She visited the sick in town. She went to church morning and evening with great devotion. She visited the Tabernacle with great devotion and love for Eucharist.
Augustine and his rebellions: Patricius and Monica decided that Augustine should study and pursue a career as a teacher, as he was very intelligent. They made many sacrifices to pay for their studies and their stays in other cities. At the age of 7, Augustine was very proud and a liar. At that time, teachers beat rebellious students with a stick in their hand and Augustine got beaten up several times. At 16, he went to study in Madaura. There, Augustine frequented bars, theaters and squares where he met all kinds of sins and attractions in the world. Upon learning this, Monica was extremely sad, because in addition to not being interested in God, Augustine was enjoying everything that was sin. Her mother's heart still had bad feelings. At age 17, he went to study in the country's capital, Carthage, a city full of atheist students and what Monica felt really happened: Augustine totally lost his faith by joining the Manichean sect that preached materialism and the liberalism of sin. She said that she wept more for her son's loss of faith than if he had lost his life, because he was at risk of condemning his soul by joining a sect that is dangerous and contrary to God's Word.
Augustine's son: Augustine had a relationship with a young woman and had a son with her: Adeodato, born in the year 372. Monica welcomed her grandson with affection, but Augustine didn't want to get married in church, just live together. In 374, having finished his studies, Augustine returned to Carthage with his wife and bay Adeodato. They went to live with their Romanian friend, as Augustine did not have much money or much success in the teaching profession. As time passed, Monica continued to pray that he would have faith and interest in God and get out of his sects and wrong ideas, otherwise he would die without repenting of the serious sins he had committed and would condemn himself eternally.
Dream of Augustine's conversion: One night, Monica dreamed that she was crying for Augustine, as she always did. In the dream, she saw herself on a wooden plank. A luminous young man, perhaps an Angel, said to him, “Why do you cry? Can't you see he's also where you are?” And when she turned around, Monica saw that Augustine was also on the same board as her. She woke up overjoyed and told Augustine about the dream. He was intrigued and she was more hopeful in her prayers. She so wanted her son's conversion that she asked sages and priests to talk to him and try to convince him to convert. But they couldn't. Monica once asked Bishop Antigonus to speak with Augustine. As she spoke to him, she shed abundant tears. The bishop told him: “Be still! Your child's heart is not yet ready, but God will determine the right time. Go and continue to pray that it is not possible to lose a child with so many tears!”
Escape of Augustine: Augustine's work as a teacher was not easy. To improve his situation, Augustine decided to move to Italy. He would go by ship. Monica said she would go with him, but Augustine didn't want to. It was the year of 383 and Augustine was already 29 years old. Arriving at the port, Augustine said that he was going to visit a friend first and asked Monica to go pray at a nearby church. And while Monica was praying in the Church of St. Cyprian, he left by ship without her. Monica cried a lot seeing her son leave and running the risk of not seeing him again. But shortly thereafter, she went after Augustine in Italy. She went on a ship with her son Navidio. Traveling by ship was dangerous, but Monica went with the courage. During the dangers of the sea, she instilled faith in sailors and crew. When they arrived in Italy, she did not find Augustine in Rome, as he had gone to Milan. Upon meeting Augustine in Milan, Monica was happy to learn that he had abandoned the Manichean sect but had not yet become a Catholic.
Meetings with St. Ambrose: In Milan, the bishop of that time was Saint Ambrose, a wise man who will play a fundamental role in Augustine's conversion. He gave great homilies and Monica began to attend his Holy Mass. As Ambrose was very influential in the city and region, Augustine sought to know his preaching and also liked it. This caused him a sympathy for Christianity. Augustine and Ambrose began to meet and talk. Monica was always in the front rows of the Masses of St. Ambrose and Augustine could not resist missing. Ambrose's homilies pleased him and clarified his questions and doubts about religions. Augustine was increasingly attracted to the Catholic faith, which in his view, was now correct and good. He always said he was looking for the truth and that he couldn't find it. But he was very tough and stubborn. This search for the truth lasted 2 years, from the age of 31 to 32, when she was living in Milan. At that time, Monica also lived there and helped the parish intensely and always prayed for her son.
Augustine's conversion: After reviewing his entire sinful life, Augustine wept and asked himself, “How long will I be crying: Tomorrow, tomorrow? Why shouldn't it be now? Why should the end of my iniquities not come at this time?” Suddenly, he heard the voice of a boy coming from the other house, repeating over and over: "Take it and read it, take it and read it." He thought it was a joke, but he had never heard such a song. Intrigued, he remembered that St. Anthony had been converted by randomly reading a passage from the Gospel that served him as a warning from Heaven. Augustine picked up the book of St. Paul's Letters, determined to read the first chapter he could find. He opened it and read in Romans 13, 13 which says: "Let us behave honestly, as in broad daylight: no orgies, no drunkenness. No dishonesty, no dissolution. No strife, no jealousy." That passage touched him deeply and Augustine decided to change it radically. It was the month of August 386 and he was 33 years old. He told Monica and she was immensely happy. She cried with joy. She waited nearly 30 years for this conversion.
Last months and days of Monica: The conversion of Augustine brought him closer to God and also his philosopher friends and teachers to faith. He was able to convert several of his friends to have faith in God. He went on a spiritual retreat with his philosopher friends while on vacation in the city of Cassiciaco, Italy, preparing to receive Baptism, along with his son Adeodato, now 17 years old, and his best friend Alypius and a few others. They lived with Monica in a farm of Cassiciaco for 6 months until March 387. There they stayed reading the Word of God, praying and preparing themselves with great faith and devotion. Monica accompanied them and participated in spiritual conversations about Sacred Scripture. She suggested reading Psalm 79 which says, "Lord, stretch out your hand over the man you have chosen, over the man you have fortified. Lord, O God of hosts. Show us your face serene and we shall be saved." These were the happiest days in Monica's life, because the more Augustine read the Bible, the more he loved God and began to have faith. Augustine and his friends received Baptism with great joy at Easter 387 in Milan, in the presence of Monica, at the hands of Bishop St. Ambrose.
Monica's Teachings: Few phrases of Saint Monica were noted. One of them was: "I do not believe that the soul feeds on things other than science and the understanding of things." That is, if we know God well, we will feed on Him. More knowledge of what is good. And also: “If you want good things and get them, you are happy. But if you want bad things, even though you have them, you are unhappy.” In other words, we are only happy with good things!
Ecstasy of Monica and Augustine: Augustine and Monica talked alone, leaning on a window overlooking the interior garden of the house. They talked about the future and eternal life in Heaven. At this moment, they were ecstatic and filled with joy.
Monica's serene death: Monica and Augustine decided to return to Africa. They went to the port of Ostia, Italy, where they would embark. In the end, Monica said: “My son, as for me, nothing gives me pleasure in this life. I don't know what I'm still doing here, or why I'm still here, the hopes of this world already fading. For one reason, I wanted to prolong my life a little longer: to see you as a Catholic before she died. God has given me this grace superabundantly, for I see that you already despise earthly happiness in order to serve the Lord. So what am I doing here?” A few days later, Monica caught a strong and severe fever that forced her to stay in bed. Augustine, Navídio and Adeodato took care of her, saying that she would get better and go back to Africa. But she sensed that she would die there in Italy and said: “Bury this body anywhere and don't worry about it. I just ask you to remember me before the Altar of the Lord in your prayers, wherever you are.” Monica died in peace and serenity 9 days later at 56 years of age in the year 387. Everyone in the house was very sad and some neighbors noticed. They entered the house and prayed some Psalms. Afterwards, Monica was buried right there, in Italy. Augustine managed not to cry much that day or in the following days, but afterwards, he could not contain his tears. He cried a lot after the death of such a kind mother.
Augustine's sanctification: Shortly thereafter, Augustine's son, Adeodato, died at just 18 years of age. After also losing his wife, Augustine became a great priest and then was elected bishop, today Saint Augustine, one of the greatest saints and sages of the Church and who led many multitudes to God with his writings. He wrote about his dear mother: “Woman of strong faith, firm seriousness, christian piety and motherly charity.”
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